April 18th, 2007

Princess Down

Tears and Blossoms

I was watching some of the Convocation at Virginia Tech, and the part between 50 and 54 minutes had me in tears (you can see it here). I thus was walking around campus, buying stamps and sending off letters (my rent!) with tears all around my eyes. I'm not sure why I was so strongly affected, but even a few hours later, I still feel sniffly. The crying has helped me feel a lot better than the 'bleh' mood I was in this morning, however. I feel lighter now. I'm not even sure what I had to cry about aside from the whole (distant) Virginia Tech incident. Life hasn't been bad lately. Maybe that itself is the reason why: I've been through turbulence since late January with only a few brief pauses. It'll come again with the exams, but this is an oasis for the brief while we get to enjoy it.

I can only wish my emotions flowed freer more often.

Some teenagers on bikes laughed at me when I walked past them yesterday. I have absolutely no idea why. The guy in Spar who called me "a sad b*d" at least had my lilac babydoll to jeer at. Oh well. I'm not all that bothered, although it's a good reminder of the bubble that exists round campus. The blinking lights of Heathrow Airport on the horizon aren't always enough to recall the real world.

I fought off the urge to just jump on a train earlier. I'd like to do a little travelling beyond my familiar limits. The weather at the moment does produce a Wanderlust effect. It feels as if dreams and emotions are closer somehow...yes, I'm all Romantic at the moment. I don't feel as though that's a bad thing.

Back home tommorrow. I've been yo-yoing back and forth this holiday, and always at the wrong times. I missed almost a week with Holly, and now I'll be missing an anime meetup in London on Saturday, as well as the peace that is so prevalent at present. I don't fancy moving all my things halfway across the country and back again, again, so this will be most likely a flying visit so that I'm back here by the beginning of next week. We'll see what the weather does, but I feel less free to wander back home than I do here, sandwiched between campus and the lakes and forest of Windsor Great Park.

I did have an update half-written last night, over a cup of lapsang souchong tea. It wasn't about the rather odd taste of the tea (I still associate smokey tastes with meat, or November walks), but about the programmes they had on BBC2, one about intellegence testing, and one about children's literature. I was going to talk about my own experience with IQ tests, and my aspirations to write, but...well, that update blew away like the blossom.